


Forever Morning

by Search_N_Destroy



Category: Gerard Way and the Hormones, My Chemical Romance
Genre: Dreams and Nightmares, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-23 01:22:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12495280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Search_N_Destroy/pseuds/Search_N_Destroy
Summary: A fluffy and angsty little one shot. steaming from a dream I once had.





	Forever Morning

I wake, soft sunlight on my face signalling the coming of morning. A time when most people would be grateful for the light, but my arms are heavy, I am weak and defenceless in its presence it makes me instantly uncomfortable but I bare it, I lay there and let it engulf me because there is nothing else I can do I have given into this fact now.  
The nights never seemed to stay long like they once had and were inevitably chased away by the day, by that sun which was only there to taunt me and leave me paralyzed like a babe in the womb but I bared it....

I could feel you then, like every other morning as you came to chase the monster away, your fingers caressing my skin lightly as if feathers tickled my pale skin and suddenly I was warm again wrapped in cotton as my skin flushed pink under your tentative touch.  
Your scent was intoxicating as you leant closer to me checking my features as though they were a work of art, I knew your careful hazel eyes would be wandering.... no doubt catching imperfections that only a true artist could see, though you would never tell me you would only sigh softly as your fingers left my face.

A second later I could feel myself lifting from the folds of the blankets which had once bound me so I could rest within your arms, I could never describe the feeling of your skin as my body nestled against your chest eager for any closeness I could get.... how many times had I listened to your heartbeat? It had become a type of therapy keeping me sane in a world I no longer understood nor liked but for you I’d bare anything.

I nuzzled myself closer still, wanting to more or less merge our bodies as my legs twinned around your thin hips, I could feel the rough denim against my thighs as I clutched at your perfect smooth arms for support I didn’t realise you had dressed already and I panicked “Don’t ever let me go” I sobbed, my tears no doubt leaving silvery trails across your favourite ripped up tee as the sudden emotion over spilled my still closed lids which for reasons I could not remember needed to stay closed.

I could picture your lazy smile in my mind as you spoke softly “You will never be alone” there was something in the tone of your voice then which stilled me causing me to loosen my grip on you it had not been an answer I was expecting to the statement I had made but I knew you were as always trying to calm me and it was working.

Silence fell between us as I tried to listen to your breathing, but I guess it was just too soft for my ears to pick up on, I tried not to worry myself as I raised my fingers to where I thought your face would be, I frowned after a few seconds of not finding anything there “where are you?” I asked confused as my hand hovered in the air “I am always here” came the reply as your lips found mine in a chased kiss my hand dropping back to the mattress in defeat.

I had always thought your mouth was so beautiful even when we were teenagers growing up together. I had stolen glances of your soft pink inviting lips in between our supposed revision sessions and had always wondered what it was like to kiss you, I had waited so many years by the time we had finally admitted out true feelings for one another that I had nearly given you a concussion with my eagerness.

And as I lay there now still in your embrace I reminded myself how lucky I was that it was me kissing you now and that brought a smile to my face. You moved shifting slightly as you ran your nose against my collarbone, the tiny hairs all over my body prickling as goose bumps erupted over my skin, something you had always laughed at and I cursed my body silently for being so weird.

You continue your descent beneath the covers as I lay back against the now cold pillow wondering what you wanted this morning, I giggled as your long hair swept against my breasts the colour red vivid in my mind as you nuzzled your face between them. “What are you doing?” I asked amusement in my voice as I strained my ears listening for the reply “Kissing your heart”  
I frowned at the sound of your voice in my head clear and sweet as always, maybe I just knew your voice too well by now but your fingers found my face again as if you knew I had been frowning and stroked the confusion away.  
“Be silent love, be still” your body weight felt good against me but I just couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling that now seeped through my bones, my heart was racing in my chest as the emotion crushed down on me but I couldn’t understand what emotion it was.

“I don’t want to let go” I told him suddenly as my once heavy arms became of use to me once more searching frantically under the sheets but I couldn’t find you..... Where had you gone now? I can’t remember you moving away from me but I also knew there wasn’t enough room for you to hide in this bed.  
“Where are you?” I demanded rolling my head from side to side “I am here” your voice sounded distant this time “No you’re not” I whined like a child “I will always be here, you just have to believe” my breathing became ragged now as I fought against the invisible bonds I had tried to forget about “Come back” I pleaded tears streaming from my un opened eyes to saturate the pillow and matt my hair even more than it already was.

“I can’t come back” he whispered sadly from somewhere far away “you wanted pancakes....” he trailed off as the colours burst before my sensitive eyes trapped against them by my frozen lids, I had demanded pancakes from Ihops because that’s what we always did on your days off we got coffee and pancakes and lounged in the sun.  
But you didn’t really want to go, you were tired and needed sleep because you had been up with the band all night discussing the forthcoming tour, but I had ignored you and badgered you like a bratty child and as usual you had bended to my wishes because you had always treated me like a princess from the second I’d met you.

Tears continued to stream as the weight of realisation settled heavy in my stomach and I screamed in anguish writhing as my illusions came crashing down around me once again and I flashed back to that aweful moment.... I’d been chattering on to you about making my own costume and colours and desert drag races because I was an excitable person in your presence I loved talking to you because I wanted desperately to be able to read your mind.... you were a genius in my eyes, the reason for living..... I guess I no longer had a reason.....  
You hadn’t noticed the truck turning; you always said I was a distraction.... I remember the impact and the sounds all around me as we flipped across the central reservation like a discarded tin can.... this was usually the time I would awake from my illusion, the bubble would pop and I would have to deal with realization that you weren’t ever coming back.

The nurses would descend then like vultures praying on flesh of the wounded as I struggled and screamed and cried out your name, I heard one of the nurses asking why I wasn’t getting any better.... I suppose she was sick of the same morning regime but I knew it wouldn’t stop.  
The matron tried to hold me down as she turned to the younger woman and declared that I was traumatized and that when the mind had been damaged like that there was no way back, maybe she thought I couldn’t hear her.

I screamed your name as my eyes finally snapped open and I began hoisting myself up on various peoples arms which sought to keep me pressed against this prison so that I could look at you stood at the foot of my bed, your face was sad as you looked at me “Come on angel don’t you cry, lay down it’ll get better” you tried to sooth me against my will as some clear liquid was pumped into my arm causing my lids to become heavy again, your face slipping from sight as I heard the last flickering whisper....it’s such a shame she’s pregnant.....


End file.
